The Last Letter to G Finished

You came before I even thought of you
You stayed even though I said so many hurtful and useless words.
You always knew when I was feeling lost or uplifted.
What special charm did you have that you could bear my stress so easily and as if nothing had happened?

I miss you so desperately every day. Where to find the strength you had for both of us?
I only used my heart for myself until you came to me.
And now I'm just a reminder of myself without You by my side. Clueless part, I'm afraid.
I no longer have any instructions on how to control my heart.

I still rarely laugh when I think of you. Most of the time I end up in tears even though I want to smile at least a little. I'll never get over the fact that you're no longer here and that you can't be...

Dear Greta,

My son looked at me in amazement when I told him about you. He had never seen me cry before. He was afraid to ask about the reason, even though he normally asks me over and over again about anything. And then suddenly he said to me: "I would really like her too, for sure and together we would make you laugh again". And when I told him that you would definitely like him too, he just said, "I know, I dreamed about her and she told me." And then, when asked about details he said it was about a month ago and then he have desribed you, colour of your hair, eyes and even your "funny G" pronounciation although I didn't ever tell him any of the details of your look or manners of your speach he has provided himself... Frankly said I was shocked.

I know, maybe it's stupid, but I think if he had a dream about you even before I told him about you, it could be the same as when you walked into my dream and told me he was going to be born. Then maybe... maybe there really aren't any coincidences and we'll meet again... ;)

Until then, I'll just write to you in my head and pretend I can do everything in life. I'm not saying goodbye, but starting today I'm preparing for a new welcome...

G2